After My Second Opinion, How am I Feeling?
I am relieved. And mad. I believe I can now get on with my life. I really got scared when the first doctor told me I had received the wrong diagnoses the first time. And that I needed surgery. And some of that fear is still with me. I am breathing a big sigh of relief. At the same time, I don't think I will be really settled on this until I go back and talk to the first doctor and find out what's going on in his mind. The little kid inside me is reeling, what does she believe?; she is also trusting the adult, that the adult is taking care of her. I guess it's a question of where do I put my trust? When a disturbing, difficult diagnosis is made I would like to know whether its controversial, how that doctor treats other cases, what other schools of thought there are. It is very hard to hold this openness and all of these possibilities and the possibility that doctor is wrong when hearing "I recommend brain surgery."
I am very puzzled and confused. I want to know why the other doctor said what he said. Why did the other doctor recommend surgery and want a repeat scan in four weeks? Does he see something the other doctor does not see? He told me that the reason for the different diagnoses was that their equipment was better. My second opinion doctor said "that's their standard line..." Is it really true that they have better equipment? Than who? I am mad at this doctor -- does he just recommend surgery to everyone? What is going on?
posted by Marie @ 1:13 PM
2 Comments:
Very happy for you! The second opinion does sound allot more positive. But if the first and the second opinion differ so much, isn't there a way to get a third one so you can take the two out of three option? Or is that a really blond look at life?
Thank you for your supportive message. I have now gotten a third opinion and that Dr. did not recommend surgery. This felt good at the time. But the first doctor is that a university medical center and is extremely knowledgeable. Perhaps his opinion is worth the second and third opinion combined...?? My guess is that there is a school of thought saying no surgery and a school of thought saying surgery. If I talk to a bunch of doctors in one school of thought I will hear the same thing and think that's the way to go. But is it? I am seeing that it comes down to the assumption of whether to treat a grade II tumor. And the impact of that treatment. So I am narrowing the field of questions, thank goodness.
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